This new series is a wedding present to my fiance. He said, “Why don’t you mention these in the blog?” And given that not only is he my soon-to-be-husband, he is also my legal counsel, I’m mandated to take his advice.
I was addicted to TV Guide when I was younger. My mother was charged with buying two copies at Wegmans every week – one for Grandpa, who kept it tucked in the cushions of his electric recliner or next to his pen collection (he collected pens from his route as a bread delivery man), and one for Great-Grandma (his mother, she of the fun stories. Her last name was Hooker. She knocks the flowers off her grave. She lived to be 94 and was the first person to tell me to my face that I sucked. She would take my mother’s hand, hit her on the cheek with it, and tell her to “stop hitting yourself, Kelly!” She was that kind of woman.)
On the car ride between Wegmans and the two TV Guide drop-offs, I would devour the magazine. First, I had to see what would happen on next week’s Full House. After getting that all-important information (“Mom, DJ is going on a date with a guy Danny doesn’t like, and Stephanie wants to get her ears pierced!”), I would flip to the front and read every morsel on every non-listing page that I could. This single-handily is why I was a speed-reader in school. I had 10 minutes to read the entirety of early 1990s TV Guide, which was much more substantial than today’s version. Continue reading